What if we choose the practice of seeing grief as a reminder that we all experience loss? That everyone's losses hurt, and that we are meant to remember and bring care to ourselves and each other when they do?

And that being with our pain is not a detriment to our growth. But rather the very path to growing.

Growing that brings healing and love not only to ourselves, but to those who came and went before us. And to those who will follow.

It never crossed my mind during the many times that I held my crying baby, in such a way that she might know with all of her being that I could hold whatever was hurting inside of her–that I was preparing myself to offer the same steadfast closeness and holding to my dad as tears rolled from his eyes in his last conscious hours.

Do you know how to ensure that all of the feelings, good and bad, that come up for yourself and for your child during through life’s changes, will be held in a way that strengthens their sense of self and trust in the relationship with you? In a way that prepares them to turn towards themselves with care, and opens their heart to receiving support from others when life gets hard in the future? In other words, do you know how to move through transitions with them in a way that teaches them how to be truly open, flexible and resilient people?

Grief is the process of expanding ourselves to make room for not only the pain, but all of the wisdom, joy and resilience that come with loss.

What we didn’t get matters too

Many of us learned to show up with "confidence" and "resilience" to our heartbreaks and disappointments. We deny and repress the pain of our story, and don’t even know there was any value in making room for the painful feelings. Until we choose the path of healing. Which inevitably calls us to know the path of grief.

Two interesting things about grief that you may not know, that can have a huge impact on our parenting and relationships